How do I start over, my only child left for college, husband divorced me 6 months later?
I just don’t want to be alone is what you said. Why? Are you a boring person to be around? Are you so insignificant that you can’t go to a movie by yourself and enjoy the movie? Are you so inept that you cannot write a check and pay a bill?
Are you so stupid you can’t read a book and the only activity you had was talking to your husband and child? Can you not go to an adult toy store and buy a vibrator? Because I don’t understand the can’t be alone attitude.
Average life span for women in the U.S. is about 80. You’re 48. That gives you 32 years to get back on your feet and have some fun.
You get your job back, rent a room and when you’re ready you rent a studio apt. You shop Goodwill and thrift shops and you decorate it and make it your own. You find several stores and make the rounds every week, you can find some great stuff!
You join a book club, a mall walkers club and exercise, you take a class, you find a hobby. You get a life and you learn that you are a strong lady and you DO NOT NEED ANYBODY to validate your life or who you are.
You do not hand your personal power over to anyone else. Your ex-husband didn’t make you who you are and you exist without him.
How to get your ex boyfriend back? Once you are back on your feet you go sign up via the county or an adoption agency for a mentor program and you mentor a kid and take them on outings twice a month or you join Big Bro/Big Sis. You go volunteer at the library, a nursing home, a local shelter; there’s lots of places for your love to go and to be returned.
One night you do laundry. One night you give yourself a mani/pedi. One night you soak in the tub with candles and music. One night you read a book. Keep your calendar busy with something to do. Once a week you go to the movies to a matinee and you enjoy getting out.
I just refuse to believe that a woman who claims to be a fighter would let other people have so much power over her personal life that it could turn your world upside down. Go get it back! Baby steps.
Little battles win the big war. The war is taking back your life and being happy. Give yourself permission to be happy, you don’t need a husband to give you permission. Be strong, get counseling when you can afford it. Right now apply for welfare and with it may come the ability to seek counseling.
I know you can do it. You know you can do it. You are worthy. Keep remembering that. Very best wishes for a brand new and happy life!